for those who don't know, i'm colloborating on an album with ben nester. the approach and philosophy of the music makes for a long story which will be made more apparent once it's released, but the reason i mention this is because i'm feeling very compelled to give my spare time to working on the music, but also wanting to continue contributing to and and engaging with what we're up to here. so...i think i will begin posting song lyrics that i'm working on and would appreciate any criticisms yall have for me. for the purposes of this post, i'll share a bit about the project: it's a concept album about a man who is in the midst of a series of dark nights of the soul - teetering toward the brink - feeling at odds with his maker - feeling that he is beyond repair. below is a song in progress that will probably fall into the number 2 slot on the album. the collage photo comes from a few shots i took while in AZ recently and one shot here at home.
Holy Is His Ghost
walkin’ on down to the liquor store
told myself that i could live with more
death’s face came roamin’ cross my mind
old demons whisperin’ thru the pines
i left home without a word to say
pitched my tent beneath the milky way
red eyes that brimmed with tears and stars
sang out to passing highway cars
amblin’ on down to the southern coast
i had a run in with the Holy Ghost
He whispered thru my ready gun
consoled me like a setting sun
i fell asleep beside the ocean blue
i dreamt that i was home in bed with you
cruel men attacked me where i laid
but they could not strip me of this weight
takin’ shade outside the stop and go
exchanging thoughts with birds and radio
i spoke their voices in my mind
as though i’d not left them behind
i spent a night or two in county jail
some stranger came along and paid my bail
i should have seen it in his eyes
i should have seen through his disguise
told myself that i could live with more
death’s face came roamin’ cross my mind
old demons whisperin’ thru the pines
i left home without a word to say
pitched my tent beneath the milky way
red eyes that brimmed with tears and stars
sang out to passing highway cars
amblin’ on down to the southern coast
i had a run in with the Holy Ghost
He whispered thru my ready gun
consoled me like a setting sun
i fell asleep beside the ocean blue
i dreamt that i was home in bed with you
cruel men attacked me where i laid
but they could not strip me of this weight
takin’ shade outside the stop and go
exchanging thoughts with birds and radio
i spoke their voices in my mind
as though i’d not left them behind
i spent a night or two in county jail
some stranger came along and paid my bail
i should have seen it in his eyes
i should have seen through his disguise
Doug- this really is great, man....there are so many great lines in it. You said that this is a work in progress. Are you planning to add more? Right now it seems a bit suspended at the end, but that might be what you're going for. Just wondering. I like the photo too. It goes well with the song. really nice, man. I can't wait to hear it when it's finished.
ReplyDeletethanks a lot man. i appreciate the encouragement. yes, it is some what unresolved at the end, and i do think that i will leave it that way, mainly because it lends to the on going narritive of the album. however, just curious, how do you take the last stanza? what do you think i'm getting at?
ReplyDeleteWell, to me it feels like a profiteer who is appearing to provide assistance to someone in need, yet having ulterior motives. Freeing someone from one constriction just to enslave them in chains fashioned out of what they want. They don't care whether the "individual" is confined, so much as that they wish to be the master/jailer.
ReplyDeleteThere also is the potential for it to be redemptive- a Good Samaritan/Christ figure. Although, the fact that the stranger is disguised brings a slightly ominous tone to his benevolent deed. It feels a little devious. Just some thoughts.
glad you picked up on the tension - it's intentional. i'm not sure if that's a bad thing or what. i think that the title is the give away though. it's a jonah story. a man on the run from his life, his family, his problems, and essentially from God. and God being God, He graciously, faithfully pursues him with enduring love. i think that the tension results either from this mans hot/cold responses toward God, or disguise as meaning one of God's messengers/angels disguised as a mere man, doing God's bidding. the man's words may have been words of surprise rather than bitterness. thanks for picking your brain about it. d
ReplyDelete